Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
