We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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