once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
No subtext here. People are naked.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Randomize
