Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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