So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
