I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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