Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
