this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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