dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house