That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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