they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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