Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
