this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
