Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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