So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
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Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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