do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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