Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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