yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
