what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
