i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
