Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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