so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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