I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
