I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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