when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
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