Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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