My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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