Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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