i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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