Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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