My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
