She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
