none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
