Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
