I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
