ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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