Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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