break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
