I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
