we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there were birth control emojis
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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