Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
he shaved USA in his pubs
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Randomize
