need another drink. this is the easiest way
plz talk dirty to me
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
