I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Randomize