He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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