I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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