Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
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please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
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She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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