So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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