But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
