Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli

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(240): View more from Maryland

This kid is drunk.

(410): View more from Maryland

I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.

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(847): View more from Illinois

oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(703): View more from Virginia

I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today

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(713): View more from Texas

He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk

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(972): View more from Texas

I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent

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(734): View more from Michigan

Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.

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