thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.