she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize